In a world obsessed with romance and couples, do we value friendships as adults as much as we used to as children? How important are friendships in adulthood, and why do we so often let them take priority after our partner, children, and job? How can we have fulfilling relationships with our friends as adults – even if we are busy with work and family?
Our guest, Anna, talks about one of the most influential friendships in her life. Unlike most of her friends, Anna did not have a romantic relationship during her teens and so friendships have always been the most important connections in her life, and she tries to continue to make them so today despite everyone’s shifting and changing priorities.
Join us as we explore the fine, fluid boundaries between friendship, romance, sexuality and love, take a look at the history of friendship and how ideals of romantic love for marriage changed the importance we place on friendship, and discuss the challenging of making and keeping friends as an adult.
Listen here: https://anchor.fm/the-way-we-connect/episodes/Are-we-neglecting-friendships-once-we-become-adults-ea30vq or download from your favourite podcast app.
One book mentioned was The Social Sex: A History of Female Friendships, from where we get the quote “it was understood that a woman could share the same soul with her best friend, but rarely, if ever, with her husband”.
Anna referenced the article Why Do We Murder the Beautiful Friendships of Boys? and we also mentioned the Art of Manliness article about the history of male friendship (*Gwen said it was Australian, it turns out it’s American, sorry!) and gave a shout-out to the Hidden Brain podcast episode: The Lonely American Man.
This article from Psychology today talked about how we are ashamed to talk about how we find making friends difficult and awkward, as if we feel shame that we “should have it figured out now”.
Some other interesting resources:
Radio 4: 500 Years of Friendship – a podcast looking at the history of friendship.